You Got MimiRolled!
by Hime-koi
Summary: A bunch of cracktastic Vocaloid drabbles. Rated T due to language and crack pairings that don't make any sense. Includes Vocaloids, UTAUloids, Voyakiloids, and SRSloids. -discontinued-
1. You Got MimiRolled!

**A/N: Here's the humor filled story that I've been trying to write. I don't know if it'll be funny or not but read it anyway cause I'm trying my very best to write it!**

**Enjoy the crack!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Vocaloid or any of the characters.**

* * *

**My Life As A Teenage Worker**

"The shoe doesn't fit on your damn fat foot!" Meiko yelled.

Meiko Sakine, a sixteen year old, was currently working at a shoe store. Currently, she was helping a women into a pair of red pumps that didn't even fit on her feet. Meiko was getting tired and angry at all the customers. Especially this woman because she thought she could fit into the shoes but she couldn't.

The woman put her hands on her hips. "I am not fat! I am slightly overweight"

_Is she blind?_, Meiko thought. She is totally obese and as sorry as Meiko was to say that because she didn't want to hurt the little feelings that the woman had, she still believed that.

Meiko turned to the little girl with the woman. "That's your future, kid. Having a fat ass and not being able to fit your foot into the biggest size in the shoe shop" Meiko said, pointing at the woman.

And Meiko was surprised when the little girl turned around and smiled.

"I know right?" the little girl said.

And Meiko knew she instantly liked the girl.

* * *

**Let's PARTY!**

"You drugged him!" Miku yelled at Meiko, holding up a vodka bottle.

"I did nothing to your brother" Meiko said, taking the bottle out of her hands. "It was his choice to drink alcohol"

Miku Hatsune looked out to see her brother, Mikuo Hatsune, dancing on top of a table with Meito Sakine at Nana Haruka's eleventh birthday. Len and Rin Kagamine were passed out on the floor with a bottle of vodka near their heads. Akita Neru and Nero were singing World Is Mine really horribly. All of the Shions were hyper from ice cream. Miku figured this was a total disaster.

Then Miku figured it got really worse.

"Noooooo Mikuo!" she screamed. "How many times have I told you not to moon people?!"

* * *

**The Debut of Momo Momone**

"GO MY WAY! GO AHEAD! I'll try my best to become the me I want to be the most!" a pinkette that goes by the name of Momo Momone belted out on a stage.

"Who the hellz are you?" a certain blue-haired man asked while licking ice cream.

Momo just sweat dropped and dropped the microphone.

"Damn it to hell" she muttered, walking off the stage. "There goes my singing career and its all because of that ice cream freak. Maybe I can get Iku Acme to teach me to sing"

* * *

**Elevators**

It was a normal day. Peaceful. Everything was normal except for the fact that.....

Kagamine Len was cowering in a corner of an elevator. How very strange of him. Why, you ask was he cowering in fear in the corner? Well, read on my friend.

"TURN IT OFF!" he screamed. "ITS HURTING MY BRAIN!"

Hatsune Mikuo stared down at his friend as the other people in the elevator also stared at him.

"Dude, what's your damage?" Mikuo asked. "Its just elevator music"

"It burnsssss" Len whispered and curled into a ball. "Tell Rin I love her. Tell Miku I was the one that stole her diary. Tell Kaito that I was the one that accidentally pushed Kaiko out a window. And Mikuo, I just wanted to tell you that you actually sing good"

Mikuo was just staring at him. "Ok, so your in love with your twin sister. Miku has been murdering people for nothing. You were the one that pushed my girlfriend out a window and I actually sing good?"

Len nodded and then waited to rot away. "Goodbye, cruel world!"

And then the elevator door opened and the music turned off. Len jumped to his feet and walked out of it. Then he turned to look at the people who were still in it.

"Aren't you coming?" Len asked.

"Press the close button, Hatsune!" Neru yelled. "Press it!"

The doors closed but Len just shrugged and walked off happily.

* * *

**You Got MimiRolled!**

One day, Kagamine Rin was checking her email. She typed in her username and password and then went to the inbox. She clicked on the first message which was from Hatsune Miku.

Rin rolled her eyes and expected to see the download link to Miku's new song as the subject to the message implied. That's the kind of stuff that Miku always sent.

However, it was totally, completely different.

Rin's mouth dropped open.

On the screen there was a picture of Miku with the words, "You Got MimiRolled!" on it.

"NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP! NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN! NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU! NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY! NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE! NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE AND HURT YOU....." Miku's voice sang.

Rin was just surprised.

She should have never trusted a message that subject said, "Shota!Len loves Black Rock Shooter'

* * *

**A/N: Was it funny? I'm not sure if I have a sense of humor or not. In fact, I think I'm not funny at all. Please review. Bad? Awful? Hime-koi should never write again? I've seen writing that is way better than this sorry shit? Any one of those would work. XD**


	2. Kaito Meets Barney

**A/N: And here we are with chapter two!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

* * *

**Kaito Meets Barney**

"OMG!1111!!!!!" a blue-haired ice cream loving freak yelled out. "Miku, look! Its my childhood hero!"

Miku Hatsunelooked at where her friend was pointing at and was surprised to see none other than Barney the purple dinosaur standing in the line to get popcorn at the movies.

"That's your childhood hero?" Miku asked, pointing to Barney.

"Hellz yes!" Kaito said, running off to get an autograph.

When Kaito arrived next to his hero, Barney the purple dinosaur turned with a cigarette in his mouth and looked at him. Kaito just stared back with his autograph book.

"What'cha want, kid?" Barney asked, puffing on his cancer stick. "I'm busy here!"

"I love you! Your my hero!" Kaito exclaimed, smiling.

"I love myself and only myself so get lost!" Barney said.

"Can't I have an autograph?" Kaito asked with a frown.

"No, damn it!" Barney said. "I don't sign autographs from blue-haired children"

So then, Kaito pulled out a red wig which Miku thought was actually Akaito's hair that was violently ripped off of his head. Kaito then put on the red "wig".

"I said no!" Barney said.

"Let's go before he gets violent, Kaito" Miku said.

"No!" Kaito said. "I want my freaking autograph and I'm going to get it!"

"That's it!" Barney exclaimed. "You and your blue hair need to get out of my sight!"

"Your racist against blue-haired people?" Miku asked.

"Look, missy!" Barney said. "I don't like green-haired people either! Or ice cream!"

Then, Kaito snapped. "OK! YOU CAN NOT GIVE ME MY AUTOGRAPH! YOU CAN HATE MY HAIR COLOR! YOU CAN INSULT MY GIRLFRIEND! BUT WHEN YOU INSULT ICE CREAM, YOU'VE GONE TOOO FAR!"

"Oh, crap" Barney said. "To the getaway car!"

"DunnunnunnaDunnunnunnaBARNEY!" And Friends said.

"Dang" Kaito said. "They got away"

* * *

**Let's PARTY! Ted's Version**

Remember that party that was in the last chapter? Well, you readers never wondered what was going on with Ted, did you? Well, now you can know with this insane version!

Ted, who was currently drunk out of his brains, was sitting on top of the roof and watching people as they walked by. Some of them were kinda scared but one man decided to talk to Ted.

"Hey!" the one said. "Crazy kid! What are you doing up there?"

"Wat did u say 2 meh?!" Ted screamed at the man.

"Strange kid...." the man mumbled to himself, walking away.

"WTF did u just SAY?!" Ted yelled, jumping off of the roof.

The man just stared at him and repeated what he said. Ted just stared at him and walked up to him with a vodka bottle while the man screamed and starting running.

"Get back hereeeeee! U r going 2 get what u deserve!" Ted yelled, running after him.

When he finally reached him, he beat the crap out of the man with the bottle and then took the man's wallet. Then, Ted looked in it to see exactly how much the dude was making at his job.

"WTF! There's only 2 dollars and a Canadian penny up in here!" Ted exclaimed, putting the wallet into the man's mouth and tried to make him swallow it. "Damn man, you don't make crap. You broke!"

Then, police sirens could be heard.

"Holy Canada!" Ted said. "Its the police!"

Then he was about to walk away but then he turned around. "No! I'm not going to run away like mah sister!"

So, when the cops came up, they rolled down the window. "Kid, what are you doing?" a gray-haired woman asked him while he just smiled at her and she stared at him.

"Having some fun" Ted said.

"Why is that guy dead on the ground?" an identical looking person to the woman but in male form said.

"I don't know" Ted said. "Who are u people?"

"I am Yowane Haku" the woman said and then pointed to the dude in the car. "This is my brother, Honne Dell"

"Kid, what's your name?" Dell asked.

"What's it 2 ya, punk?" Ted asked. "I ain't got no name"

"That's it" Dell said. "I'm going kill him"

"No" Haku said. "We have to know his name. What's your name, son?"

"Ok, the lady actually asked nicely" Ted said. "My name is Kasane Ted"

"Your arrested" Dell said, trying to put handcuffs on Ted.

"No, punk!" Ted exclaimed. "I ain't going to the slammer!"

"Well, your going" Dell replied. "Now, stay STILL"

Ted jumped into the cop car and locked the doors and rolled up all the windows. Then, he realized that Hakuwas still inside of the car so he turned around slowly and tried to reason with her.

"How bout we make a deal?" Ted asked. "You don't send meh to jail and we go catch a movie or something?"

"Are you trying to hit on me?" Haku asked.

"Is it working?" Ted asked.

"Kinda" Haku said. "Fine, I'll humor you and actually take you up on that deal"

"Alrightttttttt!" Ted said.

Then, Ted thought about Dell who was still outside. Dell had picked up the man that Ted had killed and used his arm to break into the passenger side window.

"DRIVEEEE!" Ted screamed. "DRIVEEEEEE!"

"Kid, when I get in there you will be dead" Dell said. "I'm gonna murder you!"

Then Ted took the wheel and drove over Dell's feet and drove off.

And everyone lived happily ever after.

* * *

**Pillowpets**

"Its a pillow!" Rin said.

"Its a pet!" Len said.

"Its a pillowpet!" they said in unison.

"MAKEEEE IT STOPPPPPPPP! PILLOWPETS ARE SCARYYYYY!" Akaito screamed and half choked Kaito to death by pulling his blue scarf all the way down to the floor.

* * *

**The Giant Drink**

Ted and Haku were at the movies watching Prom Night Remix 2nd Version Overrated and little did they know that someone was watching them from the shadows.

A giant drink jumped out of nowhere and said, "I knew I couldn't trust you two!"

"Who are you?" Haku asked.

"I am The Giant Drink!" the drink said. "My name must not be revealed! I fight for justice!"

"Hi, Teto" Ted said, without even looking at her.

"How'd you know?!" Giant Drink = Teto asked.

"You would do something like this" Ted said, eating popcorn.

"Dang it!" Teto said. "The Giant Drink will return!"

And then she walked back into the shadows.

* * *

**Meiko's Manners**

"Now, young lady" the woman said. "You are going to learn some manners"

"Look woman" Meiko said. "I don't even know your name so I'm just going to call you 700-pound Crack Lady"

The woman opened her mouth but Meiko just interrupted.

"Let's go 700-pound Crack Lady" Meiko said, walking in.

"Now, say something nice to the first person you see" 700-pound Crack Lady said.

Meiko looked around and the first person she saw was Shion Kaito who was eating ice cream like he always does. Meiko's eye twitched and she walked over to the blue-haired ice cream lover.

"Hi, Kaito" Meiko said.

"Don't hurt me!" Kaito said, about to run away.

"No!" Meiko said. "I just wanted to say hi"

"Oh" Kaito said. "Hi, Meiko"

"Your ice cream.....has good hair" Meiko said, forcing a smile.

"T-Thank you" Kaito said, backing away.

Meiko just stepped forward.

"Holy Canada!" Kaito said. "She's going to kill me!"

"No, I'm not" Meiko said.

"She's getting violent!" Kaito said. "Miku! Rin! Len! Luka! Gakupo! Akaito! Taito! Kaiko! Teto! Neru! Haku! Dell! Ted! 700-pound Crack Lady! Anyone!"

Meiko started getting angry. "I'm not going to kill you!"

"You expect me to believe that?" Kaito asked. "I trusted a purple dinosaur but I can't trust you Meiko"

And then he walked away.

Meiko just stared and turned back to the lady next to her.

"So, do I pass?" Meiko asked.

* * *

**A/N: The chat speak that Ted was speaking meant that he was slurring his words and pronouncing them wrong. Hope you liked! Review please!**


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